What would Jesus say? What would He say to his church? How is He wanting to respond? How does He want us to respond?
People are watching. We are representing who He is and what He's about. That's a heavy load.
I don't have answers. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to say it all perfectly as to not offend any one. Here's what I do know.
Jesus loves. We all know that in our head, but having it hit our heart. Jesus is flat out crazy about us. He's deeply in love with His church. Let's face it, we can be quite the messed up group. The religious folks were the ones that Jesus had the most run ins with, and yet, He loves us so much. He deeply wants us to know His love so that we don't fear. I think often the church resorts to fear, control and manipulation as it's source of power rather than love. We tell others, each other and even ourselves about rules and consequences and boundaries and law. We have all the consequences and names laid out so clearly and have so much fear if we or someone else crosses any of these lines. We start to yell, and then when people don't listen we can get down right mean, cruel and go into rejecting and picking sides.
Then Jesus would turn to those who wouldn't be the types to go to church, and love them. He would introduce Himself since they probably wouldn't recognize Him, because His beloved Church has many times so mistakenly wrapped itself in rules and not in a Person. He would want to go get a drink or go to their house and hang out. Get to know them as well as have them get to know Him. He would have deep compassion, understanding and the person being listened to would feel truly heard. Who ever really encounters Jesus knows how much He values and treasures and loves them. It's honestly mind-blowing and doesn't make much sense, but it's the truth.
When I talk to Him about it, I hear Him whisper that this war breaks His heart. He doesn't pick sides. He doesn't look for truth and join that team. He IS Truth. He IS love.
I read articles about "us" and "them", some respectful and some derogatory on both sides of issues. What if we have it backwards. What if it's about a Person, not an issue and sides. What if we're simply at war with our misperceptions of who Jesus is and/or how we represent Him, not with the person who has yet to meet Him. I believe that most people on both sides have really good intentions, while the way they are going about discussing or communicating vary from misinformed to hateful. I really do have faith in humanity. I believe that if we were to let go of our fear, our judgements, our preconceived ideas of who the person we're talking to is and who Jesus is and really listen, everything would change. If fear is not our motivation, what is left? I don't have all the answers, but in looking at my sweet Jesus' life I find many truths in the Truth. Love does win. I don't even know exactly how it should look or what it will end up looking like, but I know it's true. I know that, as the church, we cannot simply give up and talk about how this world is falling apart and how the devil's winning. We are called to be light and to spread Good News. GOOD news! Do I personally believe that God has a purpose and design for creation and boundaries where His love wants to keep us in to protect our hearts. Oh yes. But when I read the Bible, that is not my job, to bring some rule to the forefront and focus on it until everyone sees. My job, is to be Christ, to love, to listen, to protect, to have compassion. My job is also to not fear, to not revert to control, to not judge. Does that mean I agree with everyone about everything. No, I am strong in what I believe and why. I really am. But I need to check in with my Jesus about what's my job and what's His. When I read my Bible, it makes it clear that He's the only one who is loving enough to render true and just judgement. He's the only one who even understands enough about everything to even know which way's up and how to even start. I don't. I don't even know my own heart sometimes. I get prideful and start feeling like I've got something figured out, and then I get dangerous. I start to hurt people when I get in that place and need to repent. What if, as a church, we started there. Laid down any rights we thought we had (Jesus did that) and repented for all the ways we haven't loved and represented Jesus for who He really is, and then asked if we could try again? We started from a place of humility and brokenness in our own humanity?
Could I start? I'm so sorry. The church can be a mess. Please know most of us really do mean well, but we have our own junk that has gotten in the way and made us very proud and judgmental and hurtful. I don't know you. I don't know why you do what you do. I cross a line when I start acting like God and telling you I do know. I'm sorry for all the pain we've caused. Because Jesus is SO safe, we, as His church, should be the safest place in the world, and yet we haven't been. We've been a place where you have to be perfect or be fixed in such a short timeline that it creates and atmosphere of hypocrisy. I'm deeply sorry for not being a place where anyone can come and be heard and felt valued and important, because that's what Jesus does. I'm mostly very very sorry and deeply grieved for the Church so misrepresenting who Jesus is that now you don't want anything to do with Him. Oh how it breaks my heart. He's so beautiful, so loving and so merciful. He sees all your pain and deeply cares and wants to bring healing to your precious heart. I'm sorry for being so fearful that we've pushed you away. I hope we will wake up to our calling and start loving, but I can't promise that, but I can promise that Jesus will never change and always is ready to be awesome and accepting. Your heart is so precious to Him.
To the church. I know most of us do care. We care about peoples souls, knowing Jesus and coming to Him. I know we've been trained in how to share the gospel and how to color inside the lines so we can make something beautiful. I also know, that pride that can sneak in, it starts small, and can grow. The Gospel starts simple and becomes complicated. The passion for Jesus and His truth can start to morph into a religion that is all about coloring in the lines and not about the picture. Sweet church, I don't judge. I know that Jesus is passionately in love with us just as much as those outside of it. Did you know that? Jesus is still passionately and deeply in love with you. Even after we make a mess of things, He sees our hearts and motivations and want to bring gentle correction to help us accomplish what we want to rather than be frustrated by our efforts and to keep the cycle of pain going. He has given us the power to stop the cycle. We're not victims of evil. His love will win. If we humble ourselves, apologize and start trying to learn who Jesus is and how He loves, things will change. God's kindness leads to repentance. It's God's job to deal with all of our hearts, it's our job to love. Could we do that? Could we try? It's scary. That's why we run to control. But control is based out of fear, and God's perfect love casts out all fear, so than that means that God can't be any part of our control.... which is why I'd guess it's really not working. So if we can't control the world, if we can't motivate them by fear.... what's left? Something God's been teaching me, is you can't give something away until you've received it. I think a lot of us haven't really deep down received how much Jesus loves us. Way deep down to who I am and what I'm about without any of my good deeds or resume, but stripped down to my core, that me, Jesus deeply deeply loves. When that hits home, everything changes. Dear church, Jesus loves you like that. Outside of your service, outside of your junk, before your repent or change or do better, Jesus sees that you, and wants to hold you tight and whisper His Truth into your heart. Could we do that? Could we get that vulnerable with our amazingly perfect Savior and let Him go deep? If we did, I know everything would change. We can talk all we want about how much Jesus loves the world, but if it's coming out of our heads and not our hearts, it's just noise. I don't want to add my voice to the noise and just make more noise anymore. I want Jesus love to pierce into the darkness (including the hidden places in my heart) and shine.
To the few on both sides that are filled with hate. I'm sorry. I know you probably can't hear my heart or what I'm saying, but I truly am. Hate almost always comes from pain, and so I'm sorry for your pain that you went through to get to this point. I'm sorry that you feel like this is the only way to fight and you most likely feel trapped and alone and misunderstood. I hope and pray you too can find a place where you can let go of any of your fear and find the peace that is letting Jesus love on you.
I don't have the answer, but I know there is one. I don't know how long it will take to play out, but I do know that I cannot participate in this war against people who Jesus loves so deeply. I also know that I am not a victim, I am a participant in some way. And so I choose love. My tiny voice, my little light, will shine. Thank you Jesus for your love. Thank you Jesus your love is bigger than any hate or judgement. Thank you Jesus for being You in the middle of the crazy and always bringing us back to You. Please help us to look like Corinthians 13.
1 Corinthians 13 New International Version (NIV)
13 If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
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